an awkward situation

weekend ni ada gathering for malaysian students in germany..dorang buat sports events..and the venue for this year event is...............................Regensburg...

mr hasnul jadi ajk bowling..no biggies..then ada akak yang duk sini satu family tu nak wat bisnes makan-makan.and for that, she booked the wives in Regensburg to help her and her business..saya mmg rela hati pun nak tolong..in fact, macam excited jugak sket-sket..

tapi ada something yang berlaku 2-3 hari lepas yang memudarkan kegembiraan untuk ber'weekend' ni..one of mr hasnul's friend called...he asked our permission to let his wife, and his wife's girlfriends to stay at our LITTLE, TINY house for an overnight..huhuhu..and for that, mr hasnul has to stay somewhere else that night..what??..*sigh*

it's a very hard decision to make..well, i know they used to tumpang-tumpang rumah orang each time ada event gini..but, now that we are married, i don't think it is proper to ask a married couple, to sleep separately just to let some other people i barely know, stay in our house, and use our little private space..well, contohnya kalau kat rumah..mak-mak kita sangat pantang kan if adik-adik or sape-sape yang belum kawen, masuk bilik kakak or abang yang dah kawen..even mak sendiri pun tak kan masuk..nak bagi maid nak masuk kemas pun,mak minta izin dulu.mm..maybe i yang tak sporting, it is my bad, if i tak paham life dorang kat sini..well,nak buat camne kan...i am not a student here..i am a housewife..so, after fikir-fikir panjang..we decided to decline their request.which didn't make me feel any good..rasa jugak macam bersalah..sebab nanti mesti dorang akan cakap i susah tolong orang..sombong, etc..huhu..ntahla..tak tau nak cakap camna..since i datang germany, sekali pun tak pernah tidor pisah-pisah oke..so tetiba nak kena pisah, even 1 malam pun rasa berat sangat..suppose orang dah kawen patut paham..or maybe i je rasa camtu..i don't know..so sorry guys, kalau nak datang lepak-lepak, makan-makan memang i tak kisah..tapi ni berat sket..hope i can help you in some other ways in the future..~

so skang dah rasa tak sedap..nanti kalau jumpa..mesti akan rasa sangat awkward..huhu..ntahla..i didn't know if we made a good decision..but one thing i know is, i am no good in making friends, i am also no good to be goood to people i barely know...and i am really not good in faking smiles, when my heart doesn't want to have any..~

p/s: if i can forward this weekend, to the next weekend..so i can put myself out of this very awkward situation..~